Adults can change. So can teens. Sure, their personalities are well developed. Their values are prioritized. They've formed patterns of behavior. They've selected (or been selected by) their friends. And they have probably already acquired some sort of reputation at school. But it isn't too late to change!
As long as we can think, we can improve our character. It's
the one thing over which we have total control. Every year, month, week
or day is a fresh start ... a chance to be a little bit better than we
were the day before.
Think about it! We all have 365 fresh starts a year (even 24 fresh starts
a day).
What Do Experts Say About Teen
Success?
We are more likely to see improvement when we use research-based strategies
for helping teens succeed.
Risk and Resiliency.
Certain factors called risk factors are "red flags" of
self-destructive behavior. Other factors, called resiliency factors, are
conditions which, when nurtured, can help young people reach their full
potential.
For a teen, there are risk factors that signal danger ahead: early antisocial
behavior, early substance abuse, delinquency, rebelliousness, exploitation
and a sense that one has no control over one's future.
In the family, each of the following risk factors is a warning: poor parental
monitoring; inconsistent and ineffective family management techniques;
distant, uninvolved and inconsistent parenting; poorly defined family
rules, expectations and recognition; low parental educational goals for
children; lack of involvement in children's activities; and lack of, or
inconsistent, parental discipline.
Resiliency factors include: well-developed problem-solving skills; intellectual
abilities; a positive sense of self; self-reliance; personal responsibility;
cooperation and other social skills; interpersonal skills; belief in the
future; meaning to life; spirituality; hobbies and creative interests;
adaptability to change; and an internal sense of control of one's life.
In the family setting, work on these resiliency factors:
• close personal relationships with honorable adults
• attachment to parents or surrogate parents
• a close bond with at least one caregiver
• high, but realistic, aspirations for your children
Assets.
The Search Institute, after studying 250,000 American students in grades
6-12, found reasons why some young people prevail, not fail. The more
developmental assets young people had in their lives, the fewer problem
behaviors and more positive behaviors they showed as teens. Besides fewer
problem behaviors, more assets mean more positive traits, such as: the
ability to resist danger, good health maintenance, helpfulness, valuing
diversity, school success, and the ability to delay gratification.
For a complete description of these positive influences and their relationship
to the teen's ability to avoid problem alcohol abuse, illicit drug use,
violence, sexual activity, school problems and depression/ suicide, read
What Teens Need to Succeed by Dr. Peter Benson, Judy Galbraith
and Pamela Espeland, Free Spirit Publishing, Minneapolis, MN.
Further parenting resource websites include:
www.powertoprevent.org
www.notmykid.org
